Preheat the oven to 200 degrees F.
Place he diced potatoes in a large pot and cover with cold water by about 3 inches. Add 2 teaspoons of the salt and bring the potatoes to a simmer (don't let them boil or they'll begin to break up and become waterlogged). Cook until you can pierce the potatoes with a knife without resistance, but do not overcook. Drain the potatoes and set aside.
In a stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, start mixing the still-warm potatoes, along with the remaining 2 teaspoons salt, on low speed for 1 minute. Increase to medium speed and beat the potatoes for 2 minutes. Reduce the speed to low and slowly add the warm half-and-half. Allow all of the half-and-half to incorporate, and then slowly add the butter cubes. Mix until combined. Slowly add the whole eggs, one at a time, allowing them to fully incorporate. With the mixer still on low speed, add the Cheddar, chopped bacon and green onions.
Heat a Belgian waffle iron. Once fully heated, spray liberally with nonstick cooking spray. Scoop the potato mixture into the waffle iron in batches. Cook until golden brown, about 5 minutes. Keep warm in the oven.
Whisk together the cream cheese, ranch seasoning, garlic powder and onion powder in a small mixing bowl.
Serve the ranch cream cheese alongside the waffles. Then blow people's minds.
In a pinch, you can also buy a 24-ounce tub of store-bought mashed potatoes. Then prepare as above, but skip the first 4 ingredients and the cooking of the potatoes.